10 Tips on How to Deal with Bullies

In school, you’ve probably come across children who are often mean to each other. They might say or do something to another student who is probably shy, quiet or simply different from the others. We aren’t talking about those one-off fights that all friends have. We’re talking about students who are often mean to others. These are students who go out of their way to make someone feel miserable and hurt them, either with their words or gestures. That’s what we call bullying. But how do you spot the bully in the class?

“The best way is to pay attention to the frequency of the person’s behaviour. Is it happening over and over? Is someone being mean and hurtful repetitively? Let go of a one-off incident, but if someone is constantly making you feel hurt and upset, you need to do something about it,” says Rohit Sasvehalli, a life coach based in Bengaluru.

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It Begins with Peer Pressure

Peer pressure is a softer form of bullying, where your friends make you do things you don’t want to. Sometimes, they make fun of you for not doing as they ask you to. Sometimes, they push you into doing something you don’t want to. While it may seem easier to just go with the flow, you should never be pushed into doing something you’re not okay with. Here’s how you tackle the bullies and avoid the stress they bring along:

1. Ignore

Walk away. It is the best way to not let the bully control you. Simply ignore their words or actions. It won’t be easy, but it is the first step to stand up against bullying.

2. Say No

If the thought of talking out loud in front of your bully terrifies you, practise in front of a mirror. Try saying stuff like ‘don’t’, ‘back off’, or ‘this is not what I want’. Say it loudly and clearly. Let the bully know that you will not fall prey to their mean words or actions. In most cases a firm no sends a strong message to the bully to stop. If the bully catches you off guard, you could also laugh it off or crack a joke about it. It’s important to let the bully know that they have no power over you.

3. Kill ‘em With Kindness

When just saying no just doesn’t work, try to make the bully understand that their actions are hurting you. Quite often, bullies don’t understand just how much harm they are causing. That’s why it is important to speak up and be clear that you are getting hurt.

4. Friends Make it Better

Bullies often attack people who have no one by their side. Take a friend or two along if you’re likely to run into a bully. A bully would think twice before going after a group, as it would be one against a few too many.

Bullies often attack people who have no one by their side. Take a friend or two along if you’re likely to run into a bully. A bully would think twice before going after a group, as it would be one against a few too many.

5. Get Help

Some bullies won’t back off that easily, even if you’ve tried all the above tricks. If the bully continues to bring you down, get help from a teacher, parent or counsellor. It’s not like you’re a tattle-tale for involving the elders. You should know that bullying is not healthy behaviour and should be corrected before it gets worse. Your bully probably needs a counsellor to guide them down the right path. So, by seeking help, you’re actually doing them a favour and helping them do better.

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Bullying isn’t just something that happens in school. If you’re on social media, you may have heard of – or come across – ‘internet trolls’ who are often just bullies out to get you. Here’s how you tackle the cyberbullies.

6. Choose Your e-Friends Wisely

The world has gotten closer than ever thanks to the internet, and just about everybody bares their soul online. But you have to be careful of what you’re saying and whom you’re saying it to. Go through the privacy settings on your social media accounts to make sure you’re keeping the trolls away – they allow you to decide whom you want to share your thoughts with.

7. Protect Your Passwords

Your online profiles hold a lot of information about you, which is why you shouldn’t just hand out your passwords to anyone. If the password fell into the wrong hands – like those of a cyberbully – they could use the information they find to bully you. Keep your passwords to yourself and change them frequently to be safe.

8. Call Them Out

If someone’s cyber-bullying gets out of hand, do not hesitate to tell your parents or even the cops. Speak up and report such incidents so that the cyber-bullies don’t get away with their actions. You might just save yourself and many others from their bullying ways!

9. Stand Up For Others

Even if you’re not being bullied but someone else is, don’t just sit by and let it happen. This sends out a message that bullying is fine, which it clearly isn’t. Ask the bully to stop, support the person being bullied and report it to an elder if the bully continues being mean.

10. Get Proactive

Bullying does no good to anyone. Even the bullies themselves are often victims of their own environment, where they feel it is okay to hurt others. Read about it, talk to your peers, and raise awareness about the dangers of bullying. Ask a teacher to conduct a workshop about it, or write an article about it in your school paper or magazine.

As a responsible student, you have the power to prevent bullying and making sure that all your classmates are in a happy, safe and bully-free environment. After all, you’re in school to learn and have fun, aren’t you?

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